cruel summer

This has been a rough summer. Between summer classes, a second job and my return to adolescence, I'm exhausted! I can't muster the energy to be my normal obnoxious self, and oddly, people are not happy about that. I would think they would welcome a break from my sarcasm. Go figure!

Because I'm not in the mood to write anything worthwhile, I'm going to give you a topic to discuss. What makes a good feminist? Talk amongst yourselves...

Can I have another?

I started a blog for work.  Check it out.

Photos

and not a smiley pic of me in the bunch!

remember me?

Posting will be sporadic this summer. Spanish is kicking my ass, and it's only week 2.

I'm teaching myself to cook. I'm a lazy cook. I don't like recipes that require multiple steps, but I'm trying to branch out. Tonight, I made shredded bbq chicken. I made my own bbq sauce and shredded the chicken myself. I love my bbq sauce! And it's virtually sugar free. My next project is to make my own salad dressing. My only complaint is that there is no one else to do the dishes.

My brain is not functioning well enough to say anything intelligent, so that's all you get tonight.

redux

Two posts on the same day. Don't get used to it :)

It's my first day of post-finals freedom, and I have to admit I'm bored. I came home from work and watched Juno, basking in my new found freedom. By the end of the movie, I was thinking about all the things I could be doing instead. I managed to push aside thoughts of moving furniture and decided to write a letter instead. I haven't hand written a letter in ages, and unfortunately, my hand writing skills show the neglect. But it is finished, addressed, stamped and waiting to be put in the mail. In a couple days, my oldest and dearest friend will receive an envelope filled with illegible babble. I hope you enjoy it H!

So now I'm playing on the computer researching paraben-free makeup. If you recall, a few months ago I gave up all products containing sulfates. Well after a brief, but interesting conversation over the weekend, I decided to do a little research on parabens. Now that I'm fairly convinced that I should avoid products containing these and other petroleum based ingredients, I have to find alternatives. Okay, so maybe I don't HAVE to find alternatives, but I like wearing makeup. I don't wear it everyday, but it's nice to get dolled up and feel pretty, but I don't want to destroy my skin (or the environment) in the process. You know, if I keep this up, I'm going to end up a vegan hippie chick living on a kibbutz eating only food I've grown myself. I shudder at the thought :)

Jeesh people

And by people, I mean one specific person - you know who you are. Have some compassion for my poor finals-wearied brain!

But you are right. I have been neglecting my blog for too long. It's hard to think of things to write about when I have no life. No one really wants to hear my opinions on the primaries, and my rantings about gas prices are needless when there are others who are far more eloquent and articulate than I writing about such things. So I'll stick to the usual, boring ramblings you've come to expect of me.

With the help of Sir Critic, I have compiled my summer reading list and will begin on it tonight. First up is The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-time Indian by Sherman Alexie. When I'm done with that (which will probably be sometime tomorrow), I have The Yiddish Policeman's Union ready to go. After that, I might actually get around to reading The Eyre Affair by Jasper Fforde, which I checked out of the library around spring break and never read. Then I'll start on the books The Critic recommended. Oh, and I'll be taking two semesters of Spanish this summer.

Maybe later this week, when my brain has recovered and I'm caught up on my sleep, I'll write something worthwhile.

words

I'm starting to put together my summer reading list. I don't know how much time I'll have to read since I'll be taking 2 semesters of Spanish in 12 weeks, but I'm determined to get through as many books as possible. I think I'll read a Toni Morrison book, although I don't know which one. I want to read Julie Andrews' autobiography. And, maybe some throw away fantasy book, 'cause I haven't read a fantasy book in a long time. But after that I'm at a loss. Anyone have any suggestions?

reality

Isn't it strange how a chance encounter can boost your ego? Then, after some time has passed, you realize your new found confidence is really just false bravado. Nothing has changed.

catching up

It's been awhile since I've written, so here's a recap of the past few weeks:

I did get to see Shrug play. It was a great show, and for once I wasn't there alone. Shannon and Chad joined me. We had fun, but I didn't get home until 3:30 am, then turned around and went back to Dayton to go shopping with my mom. Then life got crazy. Papers, tests, homework and illness kept me away from my blog.

Last week, my brother was here for a visit. I spent much of the week in Dayton hanging out with him and mother. Hopefully, next summer mother and I will be able to go to Jackson to visit him.

Oh yeah, somewhere in there I had a birthday.

Now for the present:

Now that I'm quickly approaching the 80lb mark, people are noticing and commenting on my weight loss. Most people are supportive and encouraging, but I have run into a few people who can only see the down side. The strangest part is seeing the changing attitudes of people around me. For example, there is a woman on campus I had met awhile ago, even had lunch with her, but when I saw her last week she asked if we had met and was far nicer to me than she had ever been before. And then there is the guy who is avoiding me. The more weight I lose, the more distant he becomes. It makes me sad, because I consider him a friend. Then there are the people who are fawning over my changing body. I went to a shindig for the Temple last night. I was all dressed up, made up, and looking pretty good. People kept complimenting me on my weight loss and telling me how good I looked. I'm not used to getting attention like that. It's a little uncomfortable, but it's very encouraging. It's nice to know people can see the difference, not just in my appearance, but my attitude as well.

So how am I reacting to the changes? Well, I'm obviously very happy with the results so far. I enjoy life more. And I'm becoming a little bit vain. My obsession with make up has returned, and I want my clothes to look nice, not just fit. That, however, is a bit of a challenge since most of my clothes are hand-me-downs and thrift store finds. There isn't any point in paying mall prices for clothes that I'll only be able to wear for a month or two before I move on to the next lower size.

The change that surprises me the most is my attitude towards the opposite sex. I'm so used to being the unattractive one, so I haven't worried about attracting a man for some time now. When the guy at the mall asked for my number the other night, I realized that there is a whole new world open to me. And when I saw a friend at the party last night, I thought there might be some hope yet...

The world is becoming a brand new place for me. I hope this version is kinder than the last.

random thoughts

Sometimes I get upset at the twists and turns my life has taken. When I think about the lost opportunities and wasted potential, or the lost relationships and those that never came to fruition, I want to go back and do it over. There are days that I would be willing to give up the life I have now to start again and do things differently. Then there are days, like today, when I realize that everything is alright. It's not perfect, and it's certainly not the life I imagined. There are still many aspects of my life I want to be different, but it truly is never too late. Ok, so I'll never be the rock star I wanted to be as a girl, but the playing and performing of music was always more important than fame and fortune. Why can't I start a band in my 30's and just play for the fun of it?
As for all those boys I pined for, I really think they are better off where they are, with their spouses and families. I have given up too much of myself in my quest for survival, I can't imagine giving up more to be with someone I was never meant for. I am better off alone than with the wrong man, and if I end up alone - I'm ok with that (most days anyway).
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm doing well. I'm learning to let go of things I've been holding onto for too long, and hopefully those ideas, emotions, etc. will be replaced by something infinitely better.

saturday

I dislike pretension. One of the dangers of working with college students is running across 20 year olds who believe they know more than they do. Intelligence can be a blessing and a curse, especially in the young. If it is not tempered with humility, then one becomes a lonely intellectual who insists to have shunned society, when in reality society has shunned him (or her). Most of my friends are extremely intelligent and well educated, but they do not believe they are better than others for these advantages. My friends are teachers, health care workers, librarians, and writers. They share their knowledge and welcome the exchange of ideas. People who believe the less fortunate, or just someone who disagrees, has nothing to offer will never make good use of their "superior" intellect and abilities.

beginnings

I had an idea for a story the other night that I'd like to play with a little, so the following is some brainstorming about said story...

Fred just arrived in town. As a matter of fact, Fred just arrived on the planet. His real name isn't Fred, of course. He adopted the name after landing and observing the people he found on Earth. Fred's spaceship landed in a field beside an Ikea in the midwest. He was lucky enough to arrive the night before the store's grand opening, so he was able to see many earthlings as they came and went. He wanted to join them in their excitement, but Fred could hardly pass as human. He didn't look like the tradition alien, though. He wasn't green with a huge head. However, he was short and very round with spindly little legs. His head was proportional to his body, but domed rather than round. His skin was iridescent and reflected sunlight, so he could not venture out during the day. But Fred wanted to know as much about this planet as possible. He accidentally discovered that he could tap into satellite television feeds, so he spent many days watching and learning until eventually he learned English. He saw a commercial in the middle of the night advertising a local sci-fi convention. The ad showed many people dressed in costume to represent television aliens. Instantly, Fred knew this was his way into Earth's society. He could go as himself. Who would question one alien in a crowd full of aliens?

I know it's not pretty, but I'm just brainstorming. Maybe someday I'll actually do something with it.

Trip to Mars, anyone?

Welcome to the Terrestrial Travel Agency. Your travel needs are our priority. We have four planets for you to choose from. Although they all share the terrestrial title, each planet has unique qualities. The purpose of this brochure is to explain each planets highlights, and to warn you of the dangers they may posses. Please feel free to contact us at anytime. We are happy to answer your questions and to assist you in your travel planning.

We'll start with Mercury. Named for an ancient Earth god (from Roman mythology), Mercury is the closest planet to the sun at .387 AU. This gives Mercury some unique advantages, but also many serious problems. Because of Mercury's quick orbit around the sun, and its slow rotation, there are only 3 days for every 2 years. This gives you almost a month (in earth time) to explore Mercury's old and cratered terrain. Mercury also has geologic features known as scarps, which are similar to cliffs. There would be plenty of time to explore these features when visiting Mercury during the day. While the planet may be a fascinating place to visit, there are many disadvantages to this destination. First, Mercury has no real atmosphere. While this gives you an unfettered view of the universe, it does make life nearly impossible on this planet. Although there is some ice at the poles of the planet, liquid water is non-existent. Another serious drawback is the temperature extremes. It can be anywhere from 90K to 700K on the planet. Think carefully before choosing Mercury as your destination, and plan accordingly.

Venus was also named for an ancient Earth god (goddess, actually, and again from Roman mythology). Being .723 AU from the sun, Venus is the warmest planet of the Terrestrial quartet. The average surface temperature is 730 K! Even if you could survive such heat, Venus' atmosphere is deadly (unless carbon dioxide is your gas of choice). If the heat and the atmosphere don't dissuade you, then there are many points of interest on the planet. The surface of Venus is believed to be young, because of the lack of craters. There are rolling plains for as far as the eye can see, but there are also large depressions and a couple highland areas. And there is plenty of time to explore. Because of its ability to go retrograde, a day on Venus is actually longer than its year! The year is 225 earth days, whereas a day on Venus lasts for 243 earth days. Because of its thick lithosphere, its lack of water and no life, Venus is best seen in the night sky.

That brings us to Earth, one AU from the sun. We try not to be biased, but with our home office being on Earth, we find it to be the most beautiful planet and the easiest to visit. With its abundant water, Earth is teeming with life. From the smallest microorganisms to the largest mammals, there is so much variety on this planet. You can visit snow-capped mountains to arid deserts. There are modern cities and villages that have not changed in a millennia. With plenty of nitrogen for plant life and oxygen for the rest of us, the atmosphere is perfect for sustaining life on the planet. The temperature on Earth also makes it more habitable (although sometimes uncomfortable). The temperature can range from 184K to 331K, with an average temperature of 288K. Earth's surface is still young, and unique in its flexibility. The Earth's lithosphere has what we refer to as tectonic plates. The plates move, changing the landscape of the planet over time. Also, because of this movement, the lithosphere is constantly regenerating. There is so much to see and explore on Earth that we had to write a separate brochure to explain it all. If you're interested in visiting this planet, please contact us and we'll send you a copy of the Earth brochure.

Finally, we come to Mars. At 1.524 AU, Mars is the furthest Terrestrial planet from the sun. Because of this distance, Mars is much cooler than the other planets - 140 K to 273K, with an average temperature of 210K. Mars does have a thin atmosphere, comprised mostly of carbon dioxide. Mars also has water in the form of ice caps, and it is believed that liquid water may exist under the surface. Although life on Mars is depicted in Earth's popular culture, there is no proof that such life exists. However, Mars does have some attractions that make it an interesting destination. The lithosphere on Mars is quite thick and inflexible; however, Mars has the largest volcanoes in the solar system. These volcanoes are so large that they actually deform the shape of the planet! The largest peak is Olympus Mons in the Tharsis region. Mars also has an extremely large canyon called Valles Marineris. The Earth's Grand Canyon is paltry in comparison. Like Mercury, the surface of Mars is old and cratered. Although the atmosphere on the planet is thin, it does have some distinct whether patterns, such as dust storms. It is recommended that you check with us before heading to this planet. We will try to warn you if any of these storms are expected during your visit.

We hope this brochure has assisted you in your decision to visit one of these fascinating planets. We are here is assist you in any way possible. You can contact our home office on Earth, or one of our many satellite office throughout the universe. Thank you for considering Terrestrial Travel Agency.

Chinese Food On Christmas

China Buffet and Enchanted :)

Merry Christmas!

ouch!

Nothing kills the Christmas spirit faster than Christmas shopping! For the first time, I did a majority of my shopping online this year. It's fun. It's easy. And, your purchases are delivered right to your door. It was working. Then today I decided that I needed to go out to the stores. Boy, was that a mistake. First, most people can't drive. I know that I'm pretty much a maniac on the roads, but I try to be respectful and reasonably cautious (I've slowed down considerably since being hit with a $140 ticket outside Cleveland). Second, people are everywhere! You can't find a parking place. You can't get around the stores. You stand in line forever to pay. You get so frustrated that you forget this is supposed to be a joyful time of year. I'm either going to start doing the good Jewish thing and reject Christmas, or I'm going to start celebrating the holiday in February.

Before the torture of shopping, I was tortured by unfriendly medical workers. The phlebotomist was particularly unhelpful, as the giant bruise on my arm can attest. She took 6 vials of blood and didn't even offer me orange juice when she was done! :) My reward for the experience was a trip to Cheesecake Factory (a farewell, if you will) and a walk around the upscale mall.

I must now go nurse my arm, as the bruise is starting to hurt.

Straight No Chaser - 12 Days

For your amusement.

200th post

Not that I'm going to say anything more interesting than I had planned, but I thought I'd point out that this is indeed the 200th post. Amazing, isn't it?

I'm done for the semester. I took my final tonite. I learned all kinds of fun things about the geology of the US and the national parks. I'll get to drive my family crazy the next time we visit Yellowstone and Grand Teton. Oh! And I can tell you the names of all the rock sequences in the Grand Canyon starting with the Vishnu schist and ending with Kaibab limestone. Next semester the torture will be astronomy.

Now that I have a few weeks off from school (and in a week and a half I'll get 10 days off of work, too!), I'll have to figure out what to do with myself. I have about 5 books waiting on me to read, so I have a pretty good idea where to start. The 2 I'm most looking forward to are The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-time Indian by Sherman Alexie (which has been taunting me for months and now demands to be read) and The Eyre Affair (the first book of the Tuesday Next novels) by Jasper Fford. That should take care of the rest of this week. Anyone have any suggestions for the rest of break?

blogging for the sake of blogging

Let's see, I could talk politics and comment on how the House of Representatives finally did something right. Or I could express my love for my electric teapot. I love it almost as much as I love my ipod, and that's alot! Or I could complain about all the crap I have sitting in my spare bedroom making it nearly impossible to get the room clean for the maintenance man to change the battery in the smoke detector. Or I could rejoice in the fact that I live in an apartment where the maintenance man changes the batteries in the smoke detectors. Or I can just say I'm not in the mood to talk about anything and call it a night.

End of semester apathy has set in. I'll deal with whatever grade I get, 'cause I'm done!

Maybe getting cable wasn't such a good idea...

I baked challah and made truffles instead of cleaning and doing homework. My week is shot before it's even begun.

I filled out a FAFSA tonight. Yes, I know, I'm a little late, but I decided paying for next semester on my credit card wasn't a very good idea. I'm not expecting any free aid this late in the game. I am, however, hoping to take out a very small student loan. The interest rates are lower than the credit card and I can defer payment until I become a bit more financially stable. That's the theory anyway.

I had planned to write an enlightening post about upgrading my cell phone, but I just got home from Dayton and want to sleep now. Maybe tomorrow.

I've been a very bad blogger lately. In my defense, the cold I thought I was getting over came back worse than before and I was completely useless for most of last week. I'm feeling more or less human again, so I thought I should post something.

There are times that I truly wish I was a writer. Every year at Thanksgiving, my cousin and I bombard my grandmother with questions about the family. Over the years, the story of her life has begun to unfold. For some reason, this year I decided I wanted to write that story, fictionalized of course. But as I've stated here before, I am not a fiction writer. It's very frustrating to have story ideas and not be able to do anything with them!

I suppose it was inevitable. When do you think they'll start building the Enterprise?

Love and vengeance

I just got home from seeing The Magic Flute and now I have the Queen of the Night Aria stuck in my head. My goal is to be able to sing that aria, high Fs and all!

Anyway...I've had a crush on a man (are they still called crushes at my age?) for about 6 months now. It's really weird though, because I don't much like him as a person. There is obviously something about him I find attractive, other than his appearance, but there is also something about him that completely turns me off. I know this is actually a common conundrum, but it's the first time I've experienced it. I really am one of those people who is more concerned with personality than looks (okay, everybody says that, but some of us actually mean it), so if I find his personality off-putting, why am I still attracted to him. I would like it to stop now, please.

The geology test wasn't that bad, which always worries me. It's when you think you've done well that you fall on your face. Uplifting, aren't I?

Watching Bones and studying for geology. Relative geologic time and half-lives. woohoo.

Evolution

Lately, I've had some insights into myself and my character. It's a rather surreal feeling to understand your motivations and obstacles. Most people just stumble through life, reacting to various circumstances, but not really understanding what was behind their reactions. I'm not saying I'm fully self-realized. That will probably take several more incarnations, but I'm starting to understand why I try to knock down the brick wall in front of me with bare hands instead of just walking around it. Say what you will about psychiatry and drug therapy, but I know I would not have reached this point without that help. Psychotropic drugs are not the path to enlightenment, but without healing yourself emotionally and mentally, you'll never get there.

Okay, I feel the need to lighten the mood. How 'bout a quick survey?

Currently watching: Heroes on nbc.com
Currently listening to: Apocalyptica plays Metallica by Four Cellos -- Even if you don't like Metallica, I highly recommend this CD. It is beyond words!
Currently reading: Geology notes, I have a test on Wed.

More tomorrow...

Talking in circles

Sometimes I wish I had studied philosophy. Not because I enjoy philosophy, on the contrary. I think philosophers are pretentious windbags who don't actually say anything, but manage to convince people of their superior intelligence by using big words and talking in circles until no one understands what's being said, thereby causing people to believe the philosophers know more than they do. However, philosophers have one trait I wish I had: the ability to present a logical and rational argument. I tend to argue purely from emotion, which gets me nowhere, so I want to learn to argue dispassionately. Example: There are people walking around campus wearing empty gun holsters as a protest to a state law that bans guns on college campuses. I fully support that law, and my initial response to those wearing the holsters is: "Why are you stupid?". That line of questioning doesn't get me very far. So maybe philosophy isn't completely worthless if it can teach me to present an argument in a way that the other person understands and doesn't make me look like a complete idiot.

Before I end this, I am in need of opinions. I'm thinking of transferring this blog to wordpress.com. Any thoughts?

boredom


helpful

This cold, or respiratory infection, or whatever it's called is kicking my butt! Posting will resume when I can stay awake past 8:00.

It's been a strange weekend. Now I'm exhausted and not ready for the work week. But I got myself a free bottle of wine to get through.

Fuck

I'm getting old. This becomes more apparent everyday, but it really sticks out when it comes to sitting in class with 18 and 19 year olds. They all bring their laptops and cell phones and rarely pay attention to the instructor. Tonite for example, I watched people playing on myspace and facebook, playing video games, watching sports and texting. Even the people who actually use their lap tops for note taking are at a disadvantage in a class where we have to draw diagrams of rock sequence layers. When I was younger, it was enough for me to just sit in class, but I had to be actively listening to retain anything. How do these kids learn anything? Now that I'm twice the age of the average freshman, I need to take notes, very thorough, detailed notes. So, either age is catching up with me, or these 18 and 19 year olds are going to fail geology.

Stayed home from work today. I still feel miserable. Hopefully tomorrow I won't be so loopy from a stuffy head and cold medicine that I'll actually be able to write something of substance.

Please excuse me...

while my head explodes. I hate being sick!

What would you do?

I went to Kroger to get my prescription filled and to pick up some supplies for a weekend of unhealthiness. I took my purchases to the pharmacy to pick up the prescription. As the pharmacist is scanning my items, she gets distracted and forgets to charge me for the drugs. I realize this once I get to the car and look over my receipt. My question is, if this happened to you, what would you do?

2 completely unrelated questions

Why do doctors prescribe antibiotics for viral infections?

If John Lennon were a young musician today, what kind of music would he play?

sick. frustrated. and wondering why the Fabulous Johnson Brothers are telling everyone they are on the Next Great American Band when they actually aren't.

Because I goofed off and forgot to post, you only get a video today.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDSGmx8c2AM

It's starts off slow, but keep watching for the Ninjas!

Sometime this weekend, I'll actually write something.

I survived Wednesday! Yea! I'm so ready for the weekend!

Work. Choir practice. Still writing paper.

Damn, I meant to send The Critic a link before I left work and forgot, so I'll just post it here.

Busy weekend. Long day. Paper to write.

There will be no blogging this weekend, as I will be out of town.

I just realized that I forgot to do a lesson plan for the sub at religious school this weekend. I guess I should go work on that. Until Monday...

Potter Puppet Pals in

Tired

Don't wanna blog.

a demain

Midterms

I had this great stream of consciousness thing going while driving today, which I had hoped to transcribe, but my overwhelming need to study for my geology midterm has limited my computer time tonite. Must do better on this test than the last, which isn't hard to do considering the last test score. I haven't done that badly on a test since the 4th grade! Anyway, must go, the geologic features of the volcanic national parks are waiting.

Single White Jewish Female looking for...

Last Friday, I clicked on the you tube link The Critic sent me about Ann Coulter. While watching the video, I noticed in the related videos window a link to a clip of the Henry Rollins Show. I didn't know Henry Rollins had a show. I haven't really thought much about Henry Rollins since the early 90s, but, curious, I clicked on the link, which lead to another link, and another, and so on. The Henry Rollins I saw in those video clips was not the angry front man of Black Flag. This guy was articulate and funny, even almost vulnerable. I'm sure he's still the belligerent, arrogant bastard I thought he was back then, but that hasn't stopped me from developing a little attraction to the man. In one of the videos, he talked about a list of questions men ask women when they are first getting to know one another (top 3 records, top 5 foreign films, etc.). I thought I'd go ahead and answer those questions here, to save some time later. You know, for when I meet Henry Rollins and he asks me on a date (I'm a dreamer, what can I say :)

Top 3 records? My question is, by records, do you mean singles or albums? Since you did ask in the video the 3 discs in my changer, I'll reply with the last 3 discs I've listened to (since I don't have a changer). 1. Boys for Pele -- Tori Amos. 2. Mix CD I made for family music exchange (I will be happy to provide a list of songs upon request). 3. Carmen -- Bizet

Top 5 foreign films? I actually only have two favorite foreign films. I have seen more than 2. I went through a period a few years ago when I'd only watch foreign films, but none of them really stuck with me. Since my 2 foreign films are on my list of favorite movies, I'll give you that list, in no particular order. Princess Bride, Amelie, Sense and Sensibility, The Road Home (from China, it is a love story, but it's a beautiful movie), and the A&E Pride and Prejudice. Yeah, so they're all girly movies. It doesn't mean I don't enjoy a good action flick every once in a while.

Currently reading? I'm not one to only read one book at a time, so here are the books I'm currently reading: Love is a mix tape (yes Mr. Critic, I'm still reading it. I read it on my lunch break so it takes longer to read than it would if I just sat down with it), The Critical Edition of the Diary of Ann Frank, and The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-time Indian (yes Henry, it's a children's book. Deal with it!).

So there you are. If any of that piques your interest, feel free to send me an email.

Okay, I feel like I just filled out some online dating survey for a guy who will never read it, but it gave me something to blog about tonite.

To change the subject, I just found out that some friends from high school are going to be on Fox's America's Greatest Band or whatever it's called. They are The Fabulous Johnson Brothers. Check them out this Friday at 8 on Fox. Do I get paid for that?

thoughts while listening to Tori

I've been writing this in my head for a week, but wasn't really sure I wanted to post it. I decided, however, that whether or not any of you need, or want, to read it, I need to write it. So, here it goes:

Monday night as I was driving home from Cinci after meeting Sherman Alexie, I toyed with the idea of writing a book of my own. After about half an hour of formulating a story in my head, I realized that I am not a writer. First of all, I'm completely incapable of developing a character. I know this because I've tried. Secondly, although I enjoy writing, it is not my passion (to use an Oprah expression). Feeling a little despondent, I asked myself for the millionth time what my passion is. What is it that consumes me so completely that I can see myself happily doing it for the rest of my life? I've never been able to come up with a satisfactory answer to that question in the past, but last Monday night, driving on a country road in the middle of nowhere, the answer came to me. It was so obvious that I had to wonder why it took me so long to figure it out. Judaism. My passion is Judaism.

I've known for a very long time that I've wanted to be a member of the clergy. Even back in my Wicca days, I wanted to be a priestess. I actually considered going to seminary at one point, but thought better of it when I realized I'd have to convert to Christianity. I might've taken the scenic route to Judaism, but it is my cultural and genetic heritage. So, when I started thinking about becoming a rabbi, it made sense to me logically. I am a Jew and I want to be clergy. I never realized that was where my passion lies. But when I finally made the connection, it was a "well, duh!" moment. I can actually justify to myself why I want to do this. It's not just intellectual curiosity. That is part of it. But mostly it's the desire to share my faith, my knowledge and my passion with others.

I found a video clip of the Ann Coulter interview. I can't take anything this woman says seriously. However, there are people out there who are defending her and her comments, and that frightens me.

I usually run from anything involving Ann Coulter, but this is one interview I wish I'd seen.

I started writing a post last night, but it was really long, and I was very tired, so I didn't post it. I will edit it and try to post it later.

As for my day yesterday...I declared a Jewish studies minor, read children's Aleph-Bet books, scoured the web trying to find Israeli postcards for my 2nd graders (to no avail), and actually worked. I went to class instead of attending the University Orchestra concert, and was rewarded with a lecture on metamorphic rocks. How could a concert featuring the concert master and acclaimed violinist of the Philadelphia Orchestra compare with metamorphic rocks? Who would choose Tchaikovsky over shale? Okay, enough sarcasm. More later...

fiddlin' around

I tried to break in the new (very crappy) violin at Temple band practice tonight. I broke the E string while tuning, which prompted another band member to introduce me to the wonders of a chromatic tuner. Although I'd like to relearn the art of tuning by ear, the tuner is definitely something I need to invest in. I could tune my violin, bass and guitar all with one little piece of machinery. Ah, the miracles of modern science.

"The game between the Jews and the Indians

is tied going into the bottom of the ninth inning". For those of who do not know, that is the title of a Sherman Alexie poem. It is one of my all-time favorite poems, by one of my all-time favorite poets. "Why are you telling us this?", you are asking. Because, tonight I got to see Sherman in person at Joseph Beth in Cincinnati. It was the first time I had been to a book signing. I do have other autographed books, Da Chen's Colors of the Mountain being my favorite with hand brushed Chinese calligraphy, but this was the first time I actually got to watch my book being autographed while saying wildly stupid things to the author. I kept trying to remind myself that he is just a person, there's no need to act like an idiot, but I wasn't convincing myself. I practically idolize the man (not as much as a certain High School English teacher I know). He's the reason I started writing poetry, which is the least stupid thing I said to him. So, with autographed book safely in hand, I ran out of the store before my mouth could once again outrun my brain. When I'm done berating myself, I'll remember this as one of the best "entertainment" events I've been to, second only to the first time I saw Tori Amos at the Arnoff in Cinci (where I made the aforementioned English teacher stand around the tour bus for an hour waiting for the smallest glimpse of Tori). If you're not familiar with Sherman's work, I highly recommend you change that. If you like poetry, read The Summer of Black Widows. If you prefer prose, check out The Lone Ranger and Tonto Fistfight in Heaven. If you're not a reader, watch Smoke Signals. There's something for everyone!

A little sidebar about the weekend: There is nothing cooler than a newborn baby. I got to hold a 2 day old little girl, who opened her eyes and looked at me and I thought, "there could be no better experience than this, except holding my own baby, if it ever happens". Then I remembered that the sweet, angelic 2 day old would someday be a demon possessed teenager and I happily have her back to her mother.

Weekend

Whirlwind. You?

It's yet another day...

It's Thursday. I like Thursday. It's the only day during the week I don't have a commitment after work. Yes, Thursdays are good.

Tonight I came home and decided to do some housework, so I clipped on the ol' ipod and got to work. I listened to Matthew Sweet. I haven't listened to him in ages. My brother met him once in Jackson, and told him, "my sister loves your music". Although that could be taken as a back-handed compliment, he was gracious. But, I didn't get anything out of it except the story. My brother doesn't believe in autographs and such. He tries to avoid looking star-struck. However, he fawned all over Billy Corgan when he met him. Anyway...I really enjoyed listening to Matthew Sweet tonight. I might technically be a child of the 80's, but 90's music resonates more with me.

I'm currently reading Love is a mix tape. I highly recommend it.

Another day

Geesh, this posting everyday is hard. It was an average, unexciting day, punctuated by bouts of unhealthiness. The headache is mostly gone and now I'm ready for sleep. I'm really trying to think of something more exciting, but that's all I've got. Goodnight!

This gives new meaning to a sweet new year. Who needs apples and honey when they can eat the sukkah?

October 1

Highlights of my day:

1) I hit a high D in voice class today. It wasn't pretty, but I did it.

2) I finally grasped the concept of geological hot spots and plate tectonics. Maybe I'll actually get a passing grade on the next test!

It's a small world

I was in Tel Aviv this morning with 11 second graders, a parrot and a skink. Now I'm getting ready for a geology field trip to Hawaii. Hopefully, I'll be back in Ohio at a decent hour so I can do laundry and pot some plants.

Shalom!

I mean, Aloha!

I mean...oh, never mind...

Me sing pretty now

I'm taking a voice class this semester with the misguided belief that I will again be a music major. After several weeks of technical lessons, I finally get to learn an aria. I'm attempting to sing "Voi, che sapete" from The Marriage of Figaro. The first video is how it should be sung. The second video most closely resembles how I sound singing it. Enjoy!

Federica Von Stade : Cherubino's

voi che sapete

Gimme a break

We had some much needed rain today. A beautiful harvest moon is shining through my window as I type this, which means it's the first day of Sukkot. Fortunately, Sukkot doesn't require me to drive to Dayton for Temple activities, but I may visit the Sukkah that Hillel built. I'm enjoying my week away from Temple. I'm using the time to sample the new network t.v. offerings. Tonite is the remake of the Bionic Woman. Since I am a huge fan of the original show, I have to watch the new one, but I remain a skeptic. I will write a real post sometime in the near future.

E.T. phone home

I am still recovering from High Holidays. I keep falling asleep on the couch before I have a chance to post something. Here is what I meant to write yesterday.

I was doing some research and ran across this. Intrigued and amused, I stopped what I was doing and started researching breatharianism. I found this site that sounds much like the previous article. Then I found The Breatharian Institute of America. I can't even begin to summarize all I found on this site. Leave it up to an American to take something spiritual (albeit wacko) and turn it into a capitalistic freak show! This site provided much entertainment yesterday. I recommend reading the Q&A section.

la la la...

Heroes is new! A happy ending to a mediocre day.

Sunday

Chaos

Yom Kippur

As The Critic pointed out, I neglected to post yesterday. I could give you excuses, but the plain fact is, I was busy yesterday and forgot. And while we're speaking of not posting. Yom Kippur starts tonite and goes through tomorrow evening, so there will not be a post tomorrow.

Here's the crux: I promised myself when I started this blog that there would be certain subjects I wouldn't mention. Well, because of my experience yesterday, my mind is fully occupied on one such subject. So...do I break my promise to myself? Not today. If I know you and you want to know what's going on, send me an email and I'll explain all.

recant

The Critic sent this in response to my previous post. It's not nearly as inflamatory as the CNN article makes it out to be. I've had this problem with CNN before. I should know enough to verify the facts before I post stuff here. Thanks Critic.

Wow!

This is just amazing!

Ms. Keirn-Swanson's English assignment

Where I'm From
by Erin
with thanks to Ms. Keirn-Swanson
and George Ella Lyon

I am from an acoustic guitar
from Coca-Cola and pickles
(to appease maternal cravings long after childbirth)

I am from the rose bushes in the front yard
the pine trees planted by young hands
in celebration of Arbor Day

I am from Christmicah and singers
from L'Shana Pearl and Orla
I am from 'I can do it myself'
and 'I'll take care of it later'

From "you're the one who has to wear it"
and "you're so pretty; you could be an actress"

I am from The Beatles and The Eagles
Sonny and Cher
from family sing-a-longs
and Barry Manilow specials

I am from Bellefontaine and Russia
(where the pogroms made the name of the shtetl obsolete)
from peanut butter cookies and tuna noodle casserole

From the seamstress who traveled alone
to the Land of Opportunity
and the grocer's wife who created a family
in the post-War boom

I am from an LP player and the kitchen table
that greeted us with bowls of cereal and Valentine's candy
From photos still waiting to be put in albums
to share with significant others and the next generation

Validation

I don't know why this is such a big deal. I know plenty of women who are with older men, but people still have a hard time accepting an older woman with a younger man. Just call me a cougar :)

My day

Temple, grocery, laundry, study, clean.

I guess it's called a life changing event for a reason, but, man, does the mind rebel. It's not easy getting to acceptance. Hopefully I'll get there, but right now the tunnel is still too fucking dark.

For a funny commentary of America's favorite past-time go here.

The root of the problem

I started writing a post in my head last night as I was falling asleep. It was very thoughtful and introspective. The kind of post that would shine a spotlight on the inner workings of my heart and mind. It was going to be fabulous. Then I woke up this morning and it was gone. Don't get me wrong, I'm still thoughtful and introspective, I just can't put my thoughts into comprehensible sentences at the moment. But, at the moment the fact that I can compose the simplest of sentences is an accomplishment, as I am extremely tired.

I've decided to make it my goal to try to post something everyday, even if it's just a random word. We'll see how long this lasts.

L'Shana Tova!

I had a dream last night that I bought a baby at Wal-Mart for $29.95.

Can anyone else hear it? tick tock tick tock

Florence Foster Jenkins the queen of the night

Working in a music library has given me a new appreciation for opera, as the following video shows. And no, the second voice you hear is not me.

"Already, we are told, there are young people who can't sleep at night because they are convinced that before they reach adulthood the house they live in will be 20ft underwater and that Al Gore, at the tiller of his hydrogen-powered ark, may not have room for them and their families." - Clive James

I'm back. Really. Ok, so it's been awhile, but it's not like I haven't disappeared before, and at least this time I had a legitimate reason. No matter. I'm back.

Let's see. I moved. I have a nice little apartment, not as big as the last, but it's 5 minutes from work. I don't miss the hour commute. I do miss the free rent, however. And the free cable. I really miss the free cable. I can't afford cable now. I get about 5 channels, and there's never anything on. I've taken to watching my DVDs of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, but there is only so much Buffy a girl can take before she needs a change. Thank goodness for the internet!

I've been watching Dr. Who on BBC, well actually on TV Links. David Tennant is growing on me. It took awhile to adjust to him as The Doctor, but now I think I like him better.

What else? Well, through the BBC I've been keeping up with the world. The EU treaty is exciting stuff (Yea Poland for putting a wrench in the works). And I've been reading about the snow storms in New Zealand. Oh, and the vibrating condoms in India. The world is a strange and fascinating place.

Well, that's my life. Living vicariously through the BBC. What's in like in your world?

Almost back

Hey everyone! Thanks for checking out my blog while I was on hiatus. I'm not actually back online yet, just visiting :) I'll be back for good (hopefully) come tuesday, so I'll give you a full report of what I've been up to then. Please check back.

Move tomorrow. Be back sometime.

"I'll see what you're made of by what you make of me" - Ani diFranco

I get the keys to my new apartment in 2 weeks! I've started counting days until I no longer have to drive an hour to work everyday. And I've actually started packing, which I should be doing now instead of playing on my computer.

It's been an interesting week or so since I last posted. I went to graduation for the school I used to work for. It was bittersweet. I am happy for my kids, but I won't have kids for much longer. As excited as I am to move and live like a real adult, I'll miss the students.

Random question: does anyone know how to say hello in Bulgarian?

Soundtrack of your life

I don't normally posts surveys on this blog, but I thought this one was fun. The way this game is played is to put your mp3 player on shuffle and answer each question by the song that is playing.

Opening Credits -- Drugs or me by Jimmy Eat World
Waking Up Scene -- You each time by Ani DiFranco
Getting Ready Scene -- Happy Birthday by Concrete Blonde
Car Driving Scene -- Leather by Tori Amos
High School Flashback Scene -- Cut the rope by Willy Porter
Nostalgic Scene -- Kathy's song by Simon & Garfunkel
Angry Scene -- Flavor of the Month by The Posies
Agony, Painful Scene -- Super Un-glued by Squirtgun
Break-up Scene -- Say Goodbye to Hollywood by Billy Joel
Sad, Breakdown Scene -- The more I see you by Michael Buble
Nightclub/Dance Scene -- Rush by Depeche Mode
Buddy/Sidekick Scene -- Think about you by Guns n Roses
Dreaming of Someone Scene -- Every word by Belly
Contemplation Scene -- Fuego by Bond
Love Scene -- Come to Love by Matthew Sweet
Kissing Scene -- Twisting by They Might Be Giants
Relaxing Scene -- Gee Angel by Sugar
Action/Fight Scene -- 50 Ways to leave your lover by Paul Simon
Victory Scene -- Any time at all by The Beatles
Closing Credits -- A mind with heart of its own by Tom Petty

A Day in the Life

I know, I haven't written much lately. It's mostly because there's not much to write about, but also because I spend 2 hours commuting everyday. Instead of waiting for something fun and interesting to write about, I thought I'd just give you an idea what an average day is like in the life of me. Here goes:

The alarm went off at 6:45. About 7:15 I got out of bed. I made breakfast (cereal) then got ready for work, fighting the temptation to go back to sleep. At 7:50 I began my morning commute. It was a little misty this morning, but the traffic was moving along nicely. I listened to Boomer on the Morning X for most of the drive, then switched to Mix 107.7 when The X finally faded out. It's a weird transition to go from "new rock" to "adult contemporary", but with my ipod needing charged, I had little in the way of listening options. Although, when I couldn't take the radio any longer, I put in a Regina Spektor CD (11:11). I arrived at work at 8:55. By 9:00 (my official starting time), I had made my morning salutations and checked my email.

At 10:00 I had an orientation meeting at King Library. It's nice to be on a real campus, but walking across campus, uphill, in the rain: not so much fun. My orientation was on disaster preparedness. After the meeting, I began the downhill walk, in the snow this time, back to the music library. After a little more than an hour back at the post, it's time for lunch, so I headed over to the Shriver Center and got myself some food (egg and cheese sandwich on wheat and chicken noodle soup - I'm sure my eating habits are fascinating). I took my food back to the music building and ate in the green room.

After lunch, I got back to my desk and discovered the hanging file rack I needed had arrived, so I spent a good part of the afternoon cleaning off my desk and organizing my files. I have a nice clean desktop now and I should be able to find things when I need them. I spent the rest of the afternoon keeping myself occupied, all the while thinking I should be cataloging books, but never actually getting to it. It's not that I don't like to do it, I just don't completely understand it yet. I never cataloged before this job, and it's like learning a foreign language. Anyway...6:00 finally rolled around and I clocked out. I wished a student luck on his senior recital as I walked out the door.

Before I could head home, I needed gasoline. I headed uptown, stopping for dinner on my way to the gas station (fast food, nothing to worth writing about). Gased up, I started for home. The ride home was uneventful. Again, I listened to the radio to keep me awake and entertained. I passed Jesus, but I've become so accustomed to him that I don't even notice him anymore, although some days I do say "hi" to my Jewish brother. (for those of you not familiar with the giant Jesus on I-75 check this out)

I made it safely home, where I immediately got on my computer, sent a bulletin on myspace and decided to write this post. Now I think I'm going to veg in front of the tv and hopefully fall asleep before 10:00.

Good night.

Well, I had big plans to do a day in the life post, but I got kidnapped by students who forced me to watch American Idol. Okay, so maybe that's not really how it happened, but the result is the same. I do not have the time or the energy to write a detailed post right now. Instead, you get a teaser. Sometime this week, you'll get a day in the life of me. I bet you can't wait...

Shabbat Shalom

Because I've been told I need to post something, and I'm bored, I thought I'd say hello on this beautiful, freezing Shabbat evening. Hey, I'm a reformed Jew, I'm allowed to break the rules!

Life is a wonderful and exciting adventure that has kept me away from my blog for far too long. The daily commute is a pain in the ass, and I do not envy people who have to do it indefinitely. I, fortunately, only have to do it for about another 6 weeks, which still seems awfully long. I have an apartment, well, I signed a lease and forked over money, so in theory there will be an apartment waiting for me at the appropriate time. It's a nice apartment, too. I'll have a dishwasher, so hopefully no more trips to the emergency room! I'm looking forward to my move, not only because of the commute, but it's really time to leave the dorms and see how real adults live. It might be scary out there in the real world, but there are advantages. (No offense to any students who might be reading this, I'll miss you terribly!)

Oh yeah, I had a birthday. Happy birthday to me. I had an interesting birthday. I was freaking out over being old and stressed out over life in general, and my friend had something that resembled a simple partial seizure (did you find that one yet, Critic?). We were a pair. I hope the next time I am able to visit her, we are both emotionally and physically healthy. Anyway, because I was so distraught over my birthday, I thought I would get drunk. Well, that didn't happen. I had one drink and I was done. I'm such a drinker, let me tell ya. But it was good to be with friends while I was having my meltdown. Thanks Mr. and Mrs. Critic!

I tried to write a poem today about old pictures of my dad that were mailed to me a couple weeks ago. It pretty much sucked, but I'll keep working on it, because I really think it could be a good poem. Nothing like angry, maudlin poems about deadbeat fathers.

Okay, I'm tired and babbling, but instead of editing this entry like I should, I'm just going to end it here and pretend I'm not making a complete fool of myself. Good night and Shabbat Shalom!

How you doin'?

OMG! I'm so nostalgic! I almost feel 19 again (not that my 19-year-old self would've said OMG. It would've been more like: Fuck, man, I'm so fucking nostalgic. At 19 I didn't have much to be nostalgic about, but I'm getting off track here). I've been working in a college environment for over 7 years now, so why is Miami making me feel like this? Maybe being in the music department has something to do with it. I feel like I'm picking up where I left off. It almost makes want to start over with my music degree, but I don't want to have to audition after all these years of not keeping up with my training. And I don't even want to think about music theory at this point. Although one of the students asked for help with her theory homework last week, and I actually understood what she was talking about, even if I couldn't help her.

Okay, enough babbling. "How's the job going?" you ask. It's going well so far. I'm still not entirely sure what I'm supposed to be doing, but I'm getting a feel for the environment and the people. It's so different from where I came from. The people are actually nice! The students are strange and fun. And the subject matter is so much more interesting to me. Take today, for instance. In the past when I helped with a book order, we were looking at Anatomy and Physiology or Nursing for Dummies or the like. Today, I was looking through a catalog of music books. Among all the titles for counterpoint, modulation, and ethnomusicology, there was this. I never would've found a critical study of Metallica among the Respiratory books I ordered before. My only real complaint at this point is the hour (one-way) commute to work, but I've started looking for apartments in Oxford.

Well, Critic, I hope you enjoyed my ramblings for the day.

I am swimming in the fog that is sleep deprivation, but I will soon return to tell you, my devoted reader, all about my new job.

Debate of the day: Bach or Bartok?

Where has the time gone?

You asked for it, so here it is. A brand new post. Exciting, isn't it?

Let's see, my last post was right before my bat mitzvah. It was a good day. There were a few complications, but when you have six people doing a service like that, it gets complicated. It was good, though. And my Hebrew was flawless, much to my own amazement!

Then life was boring. That's a big reason for the lack of posting. There were a few highlights: I discovered a new musician, Regina Spektor. She may not be new for some of you, but I had never heard of her until a friend gave me a CD. Highlight #2 feeds my couch potato inclination. One of the students gave me a website for tv on the web, TV Links. It's a British site, but it has mostly American tv shows. My favorite part, however, is that it has both seasons of the new Dr. Who, so I spent my winter vacation watching Dr. Who on my computer.

I spent New Year's Eve playing board games with my mother and watching Anderson Cooper on CNN. Happy New Year's to you all, by the way!

2007 started off much like 2006 ended, boring. Then on Jan. 5, one of my co-workers got hit by a car coming into work. She suffered minor injuries, but we were all dumb-founded. She will be off work for 6-8 weeks. She broke her fibula in two places, tore a ligament in her knee and had to have surgery. So, if you have the need to cross a street, watch for speeding cars!

It gets even more interesting, as this week I was offered a new job and yesterday I accepted. I will be working at Miami University in the Amos Music Library. I'm excited, but I'm depressed to be leaving the people I work with now. It's funny how I'm not thinking about the reasons I want to leave; I can only think of the things I will miss. I don't start my new job for another month, so I'm sure I'll remember why I wanted to leave before this month is up. And it's a wonderful opportunity. I'll get to work in a music library! When I was a music major at Ball State, we didn't have a music library. It will be fun to be around music students instead of health sciences students!

So that's my life at this moment.

If you happen to be in the Dayton, OH area this Saturday, Oct. 21, stop by Temple Beth Or and watch me become a bat mitzvah! Services start at 10:30.

Vive le tour

I've been neglecting my blog again. Mostly out of apathy, really. I just haven't felt like writing anything. But tonite I feel inspired, so we'll see what happens.

We just moved at work. You can't imagine what it's like to move a library. We were in two places for a couple weeks. Our books were in one library and our offices in the other. That was alot of fun. But Tuesday the two were united and now we have a brand new facility and I have a new office to clutter up! And I have my very own circulation desk! No longer do I have to share with reference. Nope. I'm moving up in the world.

Speaking of work. The position in CO was filled without so much as a "thank you for applying". I'm not really upset about it. I still haven't heard anything from Bowling Green, but I decided to stay here for the time being. Why leave this brand new library? Anyway, I have a pretty good deal in the dorms and one more year to pay for my braces. Maybe next summer. I still want to move out west, just not now.

The only other thing happening in my life right now is the Tour de France. I'm a total geek for it. I'm not a bike rider. I don't watch any other races, but I LOVE, J'ADORE, le tour. I watch every night religiously. I can't miss Bob Roll. I think I like Bob almost as much as I like the tour, even if he does make up words. Okay, most of you probably don't care, so I'll stop.

It's officially the end of the summer session. We begin 5 weeks of no students. Let the summer begin!!

Wanderlust

I've recently been a bit stir-crazy. I don't know what it is. Maybe I'm anxious about the move into a new library at work, or maybe it's the same ol' dissatisfaction with my job. I can't tell you what it is, but it's got a hold of me. I thought a little change would help, so I did what I always do when I feel the need for change. I chopped off all my hair. I have a cute little pixie cut that doesn't quite look right on me, but I like it anyway. And now I'm going a little further...
I applied for jobs in Tacoma, WA, Aurora, CO and at Bowling Green State University. The job at Bowling Green is actually pretty cool. It's in the music library and sound recordings archive. I just like the idea of going to work where there are thousands of lp's, 8-tracks, cassettes and cd's at my disposal. But the downfall to all this job hunting is the fact that I can't actually afford to move out of the dorms. I have one more year to pay on my braces and finish paying off my credit cards, then I'm home free, but can I last another year?
So there's this job in Wellington, New Zealand. Does anyone know if $39000 is a decent salary in NZ?

poetry

Because Laurie asked for it, here are some poems I wrote for my class. :)
Can you recognize this place?

Bear Lodge

As I approach this place
holy to one culture and revered
by generations of moviegoers

I am filled with awe
of the giant stone sculpted by nature
rising from its bed of trees

As I read about its sacred nature
all I can think about
is mashed potatoes and flying saucers

The monument is a mystery
but I feel at peace in its shadow
I can understand why its holy

to Native Americans
and movie aliens

Spring

Explosion of color against the gray;
the once dead earth resurrects herself.
As brown turns to green, flowers bloom
in a kaleidoscope of reds, yellow and blues,
and the blossoms scent the earth with sweet perfume.
The trees answer nature’s call
with buds and branches reaching for the sky,
welcoming the sun once again.

Give me something to talk about

Hi. How is everyone? Okay how are you, my 2 loyal readers? I'm doing just dandy, thank you. Enjoying the new car, even if I'm still suffering from the shock.
I'm at work. It's the last day of finals. The place is a ghost town. Tomorrow will be worse. I'm always so happy when the semester ends. It means no people to deal with for at least a week until the summer semester begins, but no people also means unnaturally quiet and boring. So I'm keeping myself entertained by writing to all of you, my 2 loyal readers. I thought about posting some of the poems I wrote for my poetry class, but I don't know if I should do that to you. I probably will, just not right now. I think I'll stop babbling now and do something worthwhile. I hope this post of random babbling is enough to make up for weeks of not posting.

I'm an idiot. I just want to get that straight up front. Why am I an idiot, you ask? Well, last night I went to test drive a Honda Civic. I do this from time to time. I research cars, trying to find something a little bit better than the one I own, then I go test drive them, and then I'm happy. I don't buy the car. Well, not until last night when I was bombarded by an overzealous salesman who decided I needed this car. I still don't know how it happened. But, today I have a brand new 2006 Civic with all the bells and whistles, including a moon roof and ipod port. This is ridiculous. Especially in light of my last post, talking about all those cars on the highway that are held together by tape and I'm spending more on a car per month than I have on some places I've lived! The whole experience leaves me feeling like I'm holding on desperately to a speeding bullet.

I survived my birthday, without any trauma over my age. It was a good birthday, actually. I went to Cleveland and hung out with my bestest friend.
I was driving back from Cleveland, not thinking of much of anything when I started noticing the the cars around me. I was on the bypass around Columbus looking at all the cars that were held together with tape (there were an amazing number of cars that looked less than healthy on the road last night) when creeping up behind me I saw the strangest looking car. It was a Mercedes sports car that I'd never seen before, so I looked it up on the internet and showed the picture to a friend and she started freaking out. You saw a McLaren!! I'd never heard of the car, so I didn't have any clue why she was so excited, but then I saw the price of the car and realized it's rare indeed to see that car on the road. It seemed so unfair to have all these other people driving tape mobiles and some dude passing us at ridiculous speeds spending half a million on a car! Capitalism at work.

I'm sitting here listening to The Killers updating my MySpace page and trying not to think about anything too serious. Lately my thoughts have turned to where I'm at in my life (see I told you, these 5 years get to me). I'm considering a job hunt. I'm not really frustrated with my job as much as I am bored. Okay, I am frustrated, but not with the job, the people. I have to consider my living arrangements, however. If I quit the college, it's very likely that I'll lose my apartment in the dorms. That's the only thing holding me back right now.
I'm also thinking other serious thoughts that I don't really want to discuss here, but suffice it to say I'm thinking way too much these days. Anyone have any good jokes?